


Someone will love you (but someone isn't me)

by lgbtimelord



Category: Legacies (TV 2018)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Sorry, Pain, You Have Been Warned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-29
Updated: 2019-07-29
Packaged: 2020-07-24 19:48:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20020051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lgbtimelord/pseuds/lgbtimelord
Summary: And so it seems I broke your heartMy ignorance has struck againI failed to see it from the startAnd tore you open 'til the end





	Someone will love you (but someone isn't me)

Penelope looked beautiful.

That'sthe first thing Josie thought when she saw her. She was wearing black jeans and a black leather jacket, along with a green t-shirt that made her eyes look greener than usual. Her hair shined with the sunset light and Josie stood there for a second longer just to try to impregnate this is to her memory so she could never forget it. Seeing Penelope sitting by the window in the library took her back to when they were together and she'd find her lost in a book, teeth biting her lower lip, one hand on the book and the other distractedly touching her hair or one of her ear piercings; took her back to when Josie would take her away from the fantasy world to the real one with one kiss or a simple touch and when she asked what she was reading, Penelope would tell her with so many details with her enchanting voice that Josie didn't ever wanted her to stop. She missed that. She missed seeing the soft side of Penelope. The side that gave her kisses on her finger when she got a paper cut and cooked her muffins because she knew Josie loved them. She missed the fun side of Penelope. The side that took her on secret dates and put spells to make her dad's hair purple because it made Josie laugh. She regrets only seeing the snarky and snappy side of her before she left. Keeping up with the banter and discussions that took them nowhere. She regrets not reading the letter sooner so she could have spent Penelope's last days in the school together.

Her thinking was interrupted by Penelope. "So," she began, "are you actually going to talk to me or just watch me from afar?." Her signature smirk was on her face and Josie never thought she'd be so happy to see it. But Josie didn't move from where she stood. Seeing Penelope made her think of how much she missed her but seeing her also brought up all the heartache and pain she caused on her. "Okay," she continued, "I have something to say anyway. I-" she run a hand through her hair and moved so she was completely facing Josie- "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I was such a bitch to you and I'm sorry for all the pain that I've caused you. I know-"

“No." Josie started, finally being able to move. "I don’t accept your apology-" she walked to the other side of the library and sat down besides Penelope- "You- you lied, kept things from me. Made _my_ life miserable, and Lizzie's, for so long. Going around kissing people because you knew I'd be mad. You caused me all that _pain_ for nothing, and you- you enjoye-"

“Do you think I liked hurting you?” Penelope interrupted her, her eyes surprised and sad that Josie would even think that. “Josie. Hurting you was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do." Her hand lingered above Josie's for a second, like she was about to take it in hers, but instead took her hand to her lap and intertwind it with hers. "It's been so long, haven't you learned why I did everything I did yet?," she sighed, "you needed something to fight for, something to make you step out of Lizzie's shadow and let yourself shine like I always knew you did." Her eyes watered and Josie suddenly realized she had been crying for a while when she took a deep breath, she ran her hands through her face to take off the tears. It was dumb, she knew that, Penelope had seen her cry plenty of times. "I am so happy to know you did it, Jojo, and it's okay that you won't forgive me," Penelope's tears started to fall after that, "I don’t blame you. I wouldn’t want to forgive me either.”

"Do you remember that time we went to that laser tag thing? You took me there for a date-" Josie said after a few seconds, Penelope looked at her confused and then she nodded- "we went in and I was _terrible_ at it. I'd have got shot one minute in if it wasn't for you. You said you'd always fight for me," she weakly laughed and Penelope smiled along with her, "I knew that date that I was in love with you. The second time we went you said I should learn to actually not die on my own but you still kept an eye on me during the entire game," she took her eyes away from Penelope's, "a week later you broke up with me."

There was silence for a few minutes after that. Both of them thinking about that, remembering how both times they lost because they started making out in the middle of the game and got shot; remembering the dates and how happy they were then, how they laughed and smiled then; only to be tense and silent now. “After all that has happened, how do I know you mean it when you say you’re sorry?” Josie kept going, "because you're so fucking confusing, Penelope Park, you're a bitch to me and my sister for a year, dump me out of nowhere but it was all so I could what? Be my better self? Because it was all about the damn merge-" Josie stood up and faced Penelope, all her anger coming back to her- "why couldn't just tell me?! Why couldn't just talk to me instead of painting yourself as the villain of the story? Not caring about me any longer-"  
Penelope stood up at that. They were arguing again, they knew they were arguing."I do care about you, Josie. I-"  
"No, shut up. Let me finish," Josie interrupted her again,"maybe you cared, maybe you didn't. I don't know. But you left me- you left me and when to Belgium and I was wrecked," they were both crying again, they didn't really care, "and I thought you no longer cared but turns out you were helping my mother find a solution." She laughed now, humorless and heavy. "You couldn't tell me you wanted me, loved me, but were willing to go to suicide missions all around Europe with my mother. I don't understand you," she ran her hand through her hair, sighed, and let it fall to her side, "I don't fucking understand you."

There was silence after that again, Penelope didn't move at all. She heard to all of Josie's bites and angry words with a sad smile on her face. But she didn't say anything. “So? Aren’t you going to say something?" Josie asked when she couldn't take the silence any longer.

Penelope sighed, "I'm sorry," she smiled when Josie furrowed her brows, "I know you don't want me to say that, but it's the only thing I can say. I know I hurt you, that it hurts, that it probably will for a while, but I’m still glad we had the chance to know each other." She was crying again and Josie thought that's the only thing they were able to do with each other lately, cry and be angry. "But we did find the solution and you'll live. You'll have the long, boring life with the kids and the dog that you always wanted." Josie sobbed at that and lowered her head, if she imagined hard enough she could pretend her forehead was touching Penelope's.

"But I want all of that with you." She closed her eyes, looking into Penelope's hurt too much. There were too many feelings there.  
Too many emotions.

Pity.

Sadness.

Love.

"I know you do, Jojo." Her eyes traveled down to Josie's neck, where the black raven is and moved her hand along it, as if she was touching it. "But you have to forget about me. I don't want to cause you more pain than I already did-" she searched for Josie's eyes again- "Get your happy ending. You deserve it."

The time was running out, the raven was starting to fade again. "Why do you keep showing up, then?" Josie whispered. "You know the spells only works if you want to speak to me too."

Penelope chuckled, "Oh, Josie Saltzman, haven't you learned already that I can't control myself when it comes to you?" She got sober after that, "but this is the last time I'll see you. Please, Jojo, I love you but this isn't healthy for you. You have to let me go."  
Josie tried to grab Penelope's writs, to no use, she only grabbed air. "I don't want to." She closed her eyes.

"Goodbye, Jojo."

"Penelope, don't leave."

At the lack of response she opened her eyes but Penelope wasn't there. The raven in her neck looked like a fainted scar again. She looked at the window, Penelope wasn't there either. The library was too quiet so she turned around and left.


End file.
